The Best Thing I Never Wanted To Do

How many of us can say that we have done something we didn’t want to do?

Everyone? I think yes.

Most people would say something like, ‘I painted that damn room because I couldn’t wait any longer’, or ‘ I had to adopt that dog because he had no where to go’. Maybe even, ‘Here I go again. On another six hour flight to clean up a family mess’.

But have you ever known of anyone that would say, ‘I didn’t know if I wanted children’?

Well, now you do.

Before you go all crazy on me, let me explain:

I am the oldest of only two. I did not have a lot of experience with ‘babies’. My younger sister was the apple of my eye but she was also a huge pain in my ass- always tagging along, snooping in my things, throwing tantrums. 

Get over it already!

The neighborhood we grew up in had mostly kids our own age. Translation: not many babysitting opportunities, and most little kids drove me crazy anyways.

I worked hard to get through college and had a career in mind, getting married and having a family seemed like something that would get in the way of that.

Then I met my husband.

He came from a family of five.

I explained that I would marry him but that I didn’t know if I wanted any kids. Could he live with that?

He said he could.

I believed him (sneaky bastard).

Five years later, we owned our first home, had two cars, travelled, had money in the bank, a garden, pretty dishes, a big TV- and I was b-o-r-e-d.

Bored stiff.

I told my mother.

She listened quietly, never judging, always calm, an occasional head nod,  and then said with the certainty she is famous for (the kind that could resolve the Middle East conflict if they’d only call her),

“It’s time to have children.”

Really?

“Why of course.”

Do you think so?

“I know so.”

Like in the future, or now?

“Now.”

Hummmmmmm

“Ben. Mom says we should have a kid. Whatdaya think?”

“If you want to.” (I told you- sneaky bastard)

“I guess I do. I mean I don’t really know but it sounds about right. There’s nothing else to do. I guess it’s time. But ya know I don’t know if I’ll be good at it. Do you think I’ll be good at it?”

“You’re good at everything.”

“That’s true.” 

And just like that we had one- ten months later, and it was a boy, and he gave my life purpose, and screw a career, this is much more fun, he’s a blast, look at that smile, let’s build something, that lightbulb’s hot but you’re gonna have to touch it to learn, aren’t mussels yummy, I think playing Army with the cat as the tank is brilliant, I’ll make it all better- for now, put down your father’s power tools, can you get me your father’s power tool, scary movies are scary, want to watch it again, sports aren’t for everyone, you can do what with your bike, here are the keys, be back by eleven, you were but you went out again, you can go to any college you can get into, you got into where, when will I see you again, I miss you too…

the Best Thing I Never Wanted To Do
kind of brilliance.

Well played Ben.

PINIMAGE
And I did it again two years later.
Love you Chase & Bryn-
from Here to the Moon and Back.




  • Chloe Jeffreys - I was like you in that I was reluctant about motherhood. Mostly because I don’t like other people’s children very much. But come to find out I was head over heels about my own. Best decision I ever made was having kids. I don’t regret a moment.ReplyCancel

  • Christine Burke - I can TOTALLY relate…..my post for this week’s challenge was in a similar vein!ReplyCancel

    • A Pleasant House - I’ll have to skip right over and take a look! Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment Christine!ReplyCancel

  • William Kendall - I’ll admit… I knew very early on that I didn’t want children.ReplyCancel

    • A Pleasant House - I never preach to anyone who chooses otherwise. It’s NOT for everyone. But my mind was changed and it’s been a blessing.ReplyCancel

  • brittasbanter - This is great! It’s funny how us women come to motherhood. You made your journey funny and honest. Thanks for the read.ReplyCancel

    • A Pleasant House - You’re so welcome Britta! Yes, I think we all come to it in a different way. And I’m always HONEST. (not true) HahahaaaaaReplyCancel

  • Life Breath Present - This was a great post! I knew I wanted the whole husband kid thing. I wasn’t sure how I’d do it. I also thought that being a stay-at-home mother was the best for me, now that I am I’m not always sure, but we’re only 6 months into this thing. At the end of the day, it is pretty cool though 🙂ReplyCancel

    • A Pleasant House - It gets better- hang in there (like any of us have a choice). Ours are grown & gone and I miss the baby days. Maybe Grandma within the next few? Fingers crossed!ReplyCancel

  • holley4734 - Awesome!!ReplyCancel

  • Theresa Ledford - Whew, honey, my “feels” are running all over the place! That was so well written and funny and so touching at the end I got a little teary eyed. When I was young, I never wanted kids, but I got pregnant and had a baby at 18. I’ve listened to all of the crap anyone ever said to me, but I wouldn’t have missed this life for anything in the world! My kids are all in high school now and I am dreading the day they go away, but kind of looking forward to it too. Watching them grow up and become these cool, actual people is more exciting than anything I can think of. I just loved this post so much. Methinks you may have a new follower!ReplyCancel

    • A Pleasant House - You hit it on the baby’s bottom! The time was precious but you do want them to leave- sort of. At least you think so until it happens and then it’s sad, but kinda great. Does this head spinning ever end? Me thinks not. I’d love it if you’d follow along. It’s a party!ReplyCancel

  • Sue - Second born in a line of 8 kids, I was often a caretaker. I really had no thoughts of having kids. Not that I purposely chose to not have them. I just wasn’t that girl chomping at the bit to have kids and be all gushy about it. Then…. gosh, why didn’t someone tell me that having children is so wonderful!ReplyCancel

  • Angel The Alien - That is sweet! I am oddly the opposite… I have always known I want to have kids, but it just hasn’t happened yet. I tell myself that is okay, because if I had had kids when I was 18 (like many of my friends at the time were doing) they’d ben almost grown up by now, and since I haven’t even started yet, I have everything to look forward to still!ReplyCancel

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