Marital Cold Wars

 

Two weeks ago…

 

me: Ben… BEN! Don’t forget we have tickets to JazzFest and are meeting Beth.

 

Ben: Do we have to?

 

me: It was your idea!

 

Ben: Really?

 

me: Oh boy.

 

Ben: I only want to go with you.

 

me: Too late.

 

Ben: I don’t feel well.

 

me: What are you 10?

 

Ben: I think one night you said…

 

me: Shut-up.

 

Last week…

 

me: Ben…BEN! When are the Smith’s coming in?

 

Ben: in May.

 

me: That’s it? May? It IS MAY!

 

Ben: So there you have it.

 

me: What date idiot boy?

 

Ben: On thursday.

 

me: There are five of them. You’re killing me.

 

Ben: The next one.

 

me: The Date. For the love of God- the DATE.

 

Ben: Tomorrow.

 

me: Where is your gun again?

 

Yesterday…

 

Ring-a-ling-a-ling

 

me: Hello.

 

Ben: How’d you sleep?

 

me: You were there I think?

 

Ben: I slept fine.

 

me: Splendid. What can I help you with?

 

Ben: I think, I’m not sure, but maybe, I forgot to tell you something.

 

me: Let’s have it.

 

Ben: Mike is coming in. He’s staying with us for two nights.

 

crickets-crickets-crickets

 

me: Remember when you were in Berlin and the wall was coming down?

 

Ben: Yea.

 

me: And I asked you to grab a piece and bring it home ’cause how many people are ever

gonna be able to say they have a piece of The Wall?

 

Ben: Ah ha.

 

me: And you didn’t ’cause your chicken shit.

 

Ben: I wouldn’t say that…

 

me: And I suggested you move in the opposite direction from the crowd and go INTO East

Berlin?

 

Ben: What’s your point?

 

me: I’m giving you another chance.

 

Ben: To do what- exactly?

 

me: Grab the Wall.

 

Ben: Where?

 

me: Checkpoint Charlie’s.

 

Ben: Who’s playing smart ass?

 

Enjoying the velvet voice of Jeff PowersPINIMAGE

Enjoying the velvet voice of Jeff Powers

 

jeffpowersplayingPINIMAGE

My people.PINIMAGE

My people.

 




  • Carol Cassara - Ahh….marriage! LOLReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - Yes- you either roll with the punches or it rolls over you. Hahaaaa.ReplyCancel

  • Linda Roy - Hahaha! I love it! Give him heck, Cheryl! xoReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - He’s honestly clueless to most of his inane conversation. I think he’s just burned-out by the end of the day, which is why I burn is dinner! HA!ReplyCancel

  • Carollynn Hammersmith - OMG! Change the name Ben to Tim and this is a conversation I’ve had a million times in the last 8 years. There is comfort in knowing someone else has the same situation.ReplyCancel

  • Connie McLeod - HAHAHAHA, so funny and so trueReplyCancel

  • Kathleen - Men. Need I say more?ReplyCancel

  • Kathleen O'Donnell - Men. What else is there to say?ReplyCancel

  • Jhanis - Hahahahah! Torment! But the fun kind. Sometimes. 😉ReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - My eyeball muscles are very strong from rolling them so often.ReplyCancel

  • Alyson Shitastrophy Herzig - Why does this all sound sooo familiar;)ReplyCancel

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