Okay, let me be clear: not the mean, war-mongering
Not the idiots with shit for brains, and a deeply imbedded mommy complex. No. Not that kind.
Just every other kind.
Men! Men! Men!
I’ve always loved men. Even the ones who haven’t enjoyed my company, and there have been
a few two (though I know it’s hard to believe, on par with just about anything that comes out of Chris Matthews mouth).
I feel comfortable in a room of men- Old. Young. Big. Small. Straight. Gay. World Leaders.The guy who picks up my trash.
No one’s off my list.
They amuse me- so willing to discuss… anything.
Sometimes uncomfortable when they hear my opinion- or the way I deliver it.
I don’t much care if they find me d-e-s-i-r-a-b-l-e. No, not one bit.
That said, men do have a few uniquely superb traits that I admire…
Men don’t hold grudges like women do. I once told Ben that I thought he was an immature, idiot boy, who couldn’t find his way out of a burning paper bag if he, himself, had set it on fire and had a garden hose stuck up his ass. A hour later he asked me if he could fix supper. I, on the other hand, would have poisoned his nightly Alka Seltzer, which he needs because I say things like that to him.
Men can say awful things about each other and not take offense. Like when one guy questions why the other guy’s wife ever had children with him. They always laugh at this. I guess they see it as some kind of badge-of-honor, like, ‘Yea. She slept with me loser. How awesome is that?’ kind of crazy
badcool. If I said that to a man about his wife, he’d probably ask me if…. maybe this isn’t the best example after all.
Men can talk for hours about the same God damn thing with other men, and never get bored. I have l-i-t-e-r-r-a-l-y been present when this has happened and have become skilled at taking naps with my eyes open. Sorta like a supreme multi-tasking female/male hybrid, because seriously, we all know that they’re only kissing each other’s asses for access to the open bar.
Men can fall asleep on demand. I really can’t talk about this. I’m too tired.
Men don’t give a crap about how they look. Take a look to the right ladies. Over the laptop. Boom.
Men are natural navigator’s which is evidenced by their refusal to stay on main thoroughfares when traveling and yet still insist that they arrived as planned. Christopher Columbus is a historic example.
Men have Life priorities in order. Eat. Sex. Sleep. Truly. Beauty in it’s most elegant form. Nothing like the symmetry of streamlining to set the world on fire. Which they do- the ‘Fire’ thing. To the World.
Men! Men! Men!
Can’t live with them, and can’t seem to get them out of our way…
Thank God women are better drivers.