Fishing For MidLife Compromises

Fishing For MidLife CompromisesPINIMAGE

Fishing For MidLife Compromises

Spring was in the air.

The future seemed limitless.

Anything was possible– we were in Love… LoveLoveLove.


Aahhhh Youth.


At the beginning it’s all heat and being bullet proof – together.


Then comes children and it’s about stamina and making time.


Then, it’s about hoping your kids don’t screw-up too badly and how to pay for college. These both seem impossible but you’re still a romantic.


eye squeeze


Eventually, the kids make it out in one piece and you, somehow, find a way to finance their education. Of course, you’ll have to give up dental checkups and give blood every week, but the little darlings are soooo worth it.


Then something takes you by surprise as you find yourselves staring like deers in headlights at the empty in your home.


What the hell do you do with each other now?


Can you still hold a conversation?


How do you cook for two?


Can we have sex if we’re not trying to fit it in between waving one kid off for a Friday night date with the car keys and the other who will come home from the football game with a posse of friends for a sleepover? These small ‘windows’ of opportunity were soooo motivating…. 


Eventually, you find, that the time provided between college holiday breaks is kinda fun. You can do this. Dinner is served later and you rediscover the cocktail hour. You play the music you like and even dance a little. You’re, dare I say it- giddy.


And this lasts about four years.




The little sons-of-bitches grow-up and start their adult lives. They don’t come home as often and make investments without your council.


ExcuseExcuseExcuse like you earned one. Who do you think pushed a bowling ball out of a garden hose to bring you here?


You’re left with wider berths of not being the Center of the Universe and your husband’s socks are still in a pile.


He snores now too.


kill me now


You’re ready to crack open a new book.


He’s still reading the same old classic.


You want to sip champagne from ruby slippers in St. Petersburg while draped in an ermine robe with a carriage boy, named… (Oh, who gives a damn), who plies you with caviar from the Red Sea.


He wants to fly fish the Colorado.




Why yes.


You’ll just have to get used to trout…


…and the carriage boy wears waders.



Fishing For MidLife CompromisesPINIMAGE

Fishing For MidLife Compromises

  • Tam Warner Minton - Ha! We put everything we have into our families…then poof! It’s over, and all you hear about are the mistakes you made. Ugh.ReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - I once told my kids that if they needed therapy not to tell me about it. There is NOTHING i can do to change the past. Suck it up. HahaaaReplyCancel

  • Kimba - I’ve actually taken up fishing. And the Hubs even goes to a few estate sales with me. Yeah, it’s weird.ReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - So weird. I hardly recognize myself anymore. In what universe would we have EVER fished? I guess it’s the JOURNEY even if it takes you down back roads. HA!ReplyCancel

  • David Stillwell - God. I see I am not the only one who misses a rock hard pensis with plenty of girth and ample lengh… backed by the gumption that you are going to take this like a man.ReplyCancel

  • Ellen Dolgen - I love the way to write….you are hilarious and always so accurate!ReplyCancel

  • Eve Gaal - Ha! My husband snored when I met him and I love every minute! 23 years later, I wish he’d snore more but now he is an insomniac walking around and reading books in the middle of the night!ReplyCancel

  • Leanne@crestingthehill - that’s a lovely photo of you fishing in your waders 😉 besides that, congrats on producing children that make decisions without running home to mum (altho’ a little bit of advice giving would be nice!) and my husband snores too (and it’s not romantic!) ~ LeanneReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - Yes- that will be me. Naked in the river. As for the kid’s- they’re fabulous and are fully aware of their father’s night time ritual. They won’t even sleep in the room next to us! Hahahaahaaaaaaa Life. Full of surprises……ReplyCancel

  • Roshni AaMom - So much to look forward to! This is why I read your posts!! 😀ReplyCancel

  • Carol Cassara - Lordy, lordy, girl, I hear you. Loud and clear! Sooo loud! LOLReplyCancel

  • Dorothy Salvatori - Oh Yeah!ReplyCancel

  • Rena McDaniel - Can you speak up a little I can’t hear you for the snoring going on beside me! Yeah, I definitely get it!ReplyCancel

  • Renee - I have an 11 year old with medical and learning challenges, a 17 year old choosing colleges based on vacation style reasoning (weather, beach access, cut guys, parties and fun) and a 21 year-old with an Ivy league college education that is graduating in May 2016 with no clue on job or further education plans but know her boyfriends job offer in engineering with major money and exciting future is cool except for the NJ location that she thought would be California with option to move in and join the fun ride). So the husband is committed to a bead/mustache in 3 colors of grey, black, brown (I did not sign up for the college professor look) and is into working a lot, whisky and addicted to video games and his phone (not me). And James Franco pug is the best behaved kid a at teen (age 2). Oh and my mom is 92 and a half with aides who help her and call to complain about her like who is paying who to bring comfort and service to someone with memory and health issues? Oy big time life so I would love to have the fishing trips and chill time but yes snoring zzz husband my life too with a lot of WTF moments from family. Hey it’s all about work in progress and letting go of expectations or attachments to stuff or thinking that is unrealistic or crazy.ReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - Renee- you are my hero. Plates get full at our age. I just wish I didn’t have to do the dishes. I’d rather eat out. ps: I LOVE your blog.ReplyCancel

  • Abby - Hi Cheryl,
    I want to sip Champagne with a carriage boy too and at caviar from the Red Sea. I mean we’re THAT old? I’m sure our husbands wouldn’t notice:) You nailed it as usual!
    xx AbbyReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - They probably wouldn’t notice- until they needed something, like ‘We’re out of chips again, Cheryl!’ Oiy vey.ReplyCancel

  • Tammy - There’s a carriage boy? Damn. I missed that part. Caviar too? Cleary I got short changed. It was a tough transition for me, I won’t lie. There were tears and lots of confused anxiety. Once I got the swing of the empty nest, I never looked back. I love seeing my kidlet and her amazing husband. Visits are never often enough and always too short. But…here’s the good part…life turned out to be pretty damn awesome. Still…wouldn’t have minded a carriage boy…just saying!ReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - Yes. A woman needs her ‘boys’. Carriage- or otherwise. I keep mine on retainer- and they style my hair. You’ve gotta take it where you can find it!ReplyCancel

  • Chloe Jeffreys - I’ve heard of pool boys but not carriage boys. I’ll start keeping my eye out.ReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - Oh yes- and produce boys, and inventory stock boys, and the boy that delivers the paper. They’re all around. I flirt with all of them. It’s a gift- though probably not for them. Ha!ReplyCancel

  • Gary Sidley - I love your style of writing. And as a 56-year-old man, partnered by my wife for 34 years, and having fathered two children now aged 21 & 24, I can identify with your lament. However, in our case our interests are becoming more similar e.g. 10 years ago, she even developed a love for football (a sport she used to loathe).ReplyCancel

    • Cheryl - She’s pulling your leg. No woman actually likes football. *wink*ReplyCancel

Your email is never published or shared. Required fields are marked *



CommentLuv badge

B l o g s   I   L o v e